1) Listen to advice of others. Gather as much as possible.
2) Talk to adviser about eliminating NMR work (that I have no idea WHY I’m doing it) from proposal/poster/thesis. Lab PI (my adviser’s boss) challenged my adviser in a lab meeting Friday wanting to know why that’s in my project; but like always, let my adviser win. I have asked my adviser why I’m doing it; he skirted the issue. Another committee member asked why I’m doing it. Apparently no ones knows why, except my adviser (maybe). But guess who is going to have to do the research and present it in front of everyone at some point–me. If adviser won’t agree that NMR should be taken off my project, I’ll ask PI again…and other committee member. If they don’t challenge my adviser, I know he won’t stick up for me when things get rough. This has been tried, tested, and proven (something you can’t even do with science–for you can’t actually prove anything in science: fact). This does not bode well for me staying. If I did stay, I’d basically have to start all over with another lab, adviser, committee project–is it worth it? Negative.
3) Need to figure out what is going on with NMR work considering I’m expected to write a fellowship proposal over it with attached personal statement saying what I will be doing in the future to help mankind with my research, how much I LOVE science research, etc. HAhahahahaha…that’s hilarious.
4) Talk to secretary in our department about what will happen with this class I’m currently taking if I decided to leave the program. What will happen to my RA contract? What procedure would I have to follow for leaving?
P.S. As of today, I’m officially being paid less than I was when I had a summer job at home…when I was in high school. Aunt Bobbie, working for you with photography is looking better and better.
5) Keep reminding myself that, whether it feels like it or not, it’s a choice whether or not I want to be here.
6) Keep up life outside of here so I don’t go insane.
7) Stop complaining. Ah, this is the hardest one. I’m working on it.